Brr… Cold, Cold Days!!!

Lately it has been so cold in Uni. It doesn’t help that most of the time I’m in the lounge, it starts to pour like there’s no tomorrow… twice this week, I was stuck in Uni unable to go out for lunch. The first time around, I had to resort to buying cafeteria food then hurrying to find a nice warm and dry lecture theatre to dine. The cafeteria was full to the brim with students, you see... the second time around, i braved the rain and walked to Medan to have my lunch with nick, hong, alex and mei ling. luckily, i had "my" jacket with me. with the hood up, and the jacket covering me up to my thighs, i was very dry when i reached Medan.

when working in the lounge, it can get so cold my fingers turn blue. to remedy the situation, what i do is i try to drink more water i brought from home and fill my bottle nearly full of the hot water in the gym. i would then have my make shift hot water bottle!!! ain't i a genius?! hahah! luckily, i have my jacket with me most of the time, or i think i would have turned into a frozen popsicle! nick's lips turned blue today from the cold. freaky... i rue the day he goes to some snowy place. i think i'd have fun keeping his lips pink! :P

i have officially handed up my first two assignments of the semester!!! woot! both of which i tried to complete in the student lounge with frozen fingers as i hammered away on my keyboard... jacket or no, it was freaking cold! i think the thermostat has konged out! i'm surprised if the temperature in the room was less than 16 degrees celcius! and that is too cold for me without my lunch to metabolise into heat! ok, technically, heat is a by-product... but then let's not get all antsy about it eh? :D

speaking of bugs, i have officially sucessfully stained my first set of Drosophila Krupple mutation egg! woot! it was so pretty! the bands are lovely! i haven't taken my pictures from the student drive though... muct get around to doing it! while we were waiting for our stains to be done, we (ok, mainly me) started to "analyse" a parasetic insect that sucks sap for a living (not aphids). come to think of it, i remind me of those little kids that pull the wings off flies to see if they'll survive. cruel, but i was curious whether it would stain with the same reagents we used to stain the eggs. obviously not... but worth the shot. i'm so freaking evil...

Tropical Aquatic Biology Trip

i love uni for this... the trips, the great chances to see things and learn things that really matter to you. like this subject that i'm taking. i love learning about nature. i try adopting a rational and logical approach when dealing with things like conservation and protection of the environment we live in. i took a few pictures of the places we went this short trip. the trip was some 2 weeks back but then i haven't had the time to upload the pics to my laptop since my stooooooopid usb ports have decided to die on me last minute... sigh! anyways, i have them here!!! :)

this is the first place we went to. it's a old tin mine lake in kelana jaya. as you can see, the lake is really polluted with all the rubbish that people staying around here throw into the lake. it's been cleaned up so there are basically more living things and less rubbish. we managed to get quite alot of little bugs and snails. we were mainly on a quest for the creepy crawlies but then a few little fish got caught in our nets and sample jars. sadly for the cute ickle fishies, they had to be subjected to alcohol poisoning... in super huge quantities.. :S

our next stop was at a peat swamp pool beside the road. i think that's where i picked up a few bugs... anyway, we found loads of super cool bugs there! this included dragonfly larvae, mayfly and damselfly larvae, cute little flies (that i have been yet to identify...) and sadly, another ickle fishie that was hiding under the root i pulled up. sigh! and yes, this ickle fishie died an alcoholic's death... the plant that was hiding the ickle fishie is the same as the one in the picture i have below. it's not a good picture and i did not do it justice cos i couldn't wade out into the swamp... (and i don't want to le!)luckily for any other little fishes that were at the next site we were at, there was a relatively fast flowing body of water. said body of water was a drain that was used to drain the water out of the peat swamp. there however, as beautiful the shade was, stank to high heavens. my lecturer not so subtly mentioned that there, the locals do their toilet... not the best thing to tell your student when she has to put her hands into the water to collect water samples... i was really grossed out...
anyhow, the bad thing about these trips is if you don't be careful, you end up having to pay a doctor's fee... as in my case. i think i picked up a stomach bug (bacterial infection) and ended up having diarrhoea at least twice a day. hahah! anyhow, by the time i went to the doc, i had already started to heal by myself and the doc decided that i didn't need to have such a long course of antibiotics.

the last place we went was FRIM. had to do sampling at the river.i caught a crab there!!! so super cute! and two shrimp! hahah! there were alot of other things, but alas, another ickle fishie. sigh!!! FRIMis beautiful in its own way. though i think there are waaay too many people there. i was hoping to see monkeys and a few birds but due to the high number of visitors there, most of the wildlife shy away. luckily for us, the site we sampled from was further upstream, with much less rubbish.

oh well, it goes without saying i had fun. we were all tired and really smelly at the end! we reached back at uni at around 6.30 and i had dinner with nick and his folks before nick sent me home. anyway, here's some of the pics i took of us having fun on the bus. :)


Chris and Kate laughing about a picture Darren took

Yvonne and I (Kim's hand in the background)



The guys posing (or trying to)

Kate beating herself up for letting us take her pic while she sang! hahah!

How Slooooow Are You?

i take pride in myself being able to react to situations quickly to adapt and figure a way out of messes. like how a pout is wonderful when you find you really have no one to eat with during lunch and your boyfriend has eaten... but then i took this reaction test that has ultimately put me to utter shame... hahah! i was a utter slow poke in the first few tries! try this.

initially, i got a average reaction time of 0.301 then 0.291... oh well. nick got an average of 0.203... hahah! see, he's a sharp one that guy... i wonder how derek would fare... hahah!

anyway, i've been feeling sluggish as of late, so maybe when i'm all perked up, i'll try it again! ahhaha! but then this kind of reaction time can't really predict much. when it boils down to if you're being threatened and you adrenaline is coarsing through your veins, your senses heightened, you'll be moving faster and using alot more energy than you could ever imagine. maybe to get the best workout, one should get an adrenaline rush... makes you burn much more... maybe i should scare the shit out of myself before going to the gym...

Things Working People Do At Lunch to Ang Mohs...

daddy dear has openned my eyes to the really cruel world of practical pranks adults pull on each other... not as cruel as some of the ones that my friends and i pull, but mean anyhow.

My dad and his colleagues went to a dai chau near his wor place and ordered a stewed pork dish. knowing our chinese food, it looked messy and the meat barely recognisable as pork. there's a ang moh guy that works with my dad so he joined them for lunch. as they start to eat, my dad and his colleagues start taking the vegetables that have loads of the sauce in them, the ang moh however, he attacked the meat. noticing this, he asked my dad why they weren't eating the meat.

my dad, with a very straight face answered, "well, this meat here, is fermented frog. we don't eat it. it's cooked as a stew for the taste,"

it didn't help that the rest of the group began adding things like how to ferment the frog, how to prepare the frog... all that rubbish.

the poor ang moh, to this day, boasts of having eaten fermented frog. i dread the day that someone tells him what a fool he is... ahha!

Are We Babarians?

today, we went to Ecopark to watch 88 lions dance. it was hot, sweaty and for me, terribly infuriating. there was this long speech from S'gor's minister and then only did the lions dance. the lion dance was short and brief but nice. there were 88 so hard to coordinate all of them. there were 2 dragons thrown into the mix too. the funny thing was that tonight, there were bats flying overhead catching the moths that were attracted to the spotlights in the park the stage was at. i'm not sure if anyone was divebombed with guano, but some of them may actually deserve it. overall, nothing all that spectacular, but it was nice enough. the infuriating bit comes next...

the picture on your right was taken when the crowd had slowed down. this was after i finished my meal... we had a 'free' buffet dinner whereby everyone decided it was an oppurtunity to pig out and eat as much as possible, take as many bottles of water (free ma) as possible and finish said bottles of water to fill it with the juice provided. Malaysia in a nutshell? pushing, shoving, greedy, pigs. year of the boar, i know, but we're civilised! please, take what you can eat and don't shove me as i'm walking back to my table carrying a bowl of soup and a bun (an adult... can you imagine?!). most of the people there were chinese, which means the need for mountains of free food is high (regardless of whether they can eat it or not!)...

another thing, please ppl, if you want to eat, please be a little more civilised. the ladle for the potatoes are meant to stay there, not be shoved deep in the bowels of the fried eggs then placed 'responsibly' back into the potatoes! i seriously don't think that people would enjoy finding eggy potatoes when they wanted them plain. oh and by the way, use the thongs to pick up the bread, not your fingers if you intend to examine the piece and put it down. it's freaking unsanitary.

not only that, please la, i know you want to see the lion dance, but so do we. don't go shoving here and there with your fucking sweaty body just to get to the front. ma hai, i waited in the crowd too le. if you want to see, come early, dickhead, don't play 'pushing' with my brother and me. i hate sweat, so i'll freaking snarl at you. not only that, please don't send your kids pushing a path for you. they're not freaking moses parting the throng of people that, just like you, want to watch the damn event.

*i realise i sound juvenile in both sentence structure and rants, but i'm seriously pissed off with m'sian attitudes of kiasu-ness. we call s'poreans kiasu, yet we act just the same. one of the reasons i hate free buffets.

Creationism and Darwinian…

I’m a Christian and lately, I’ve been hearing that many schools in the US have decided against teaching the Darwinian Evolution. As a science student and aspiring scientist, I find this absurd. Seriously.
I mean think about it rationally. Do you seriously think the world is less than 100k years old? Not likely. Not possible considering carbon dating has already proven otherwise. So why are people insisting that it’s so possible for creationism to be valid? It’s basis is the bible! The bible may be the word of God but I doubt he wants us to take it word for word?!

I personally have my own views on how the bible may be interpreted. I’m a born and bred Catholic and proud to say so. I don’t blindly follow everything the bible says because if that were the case, there would be a totally different Beat typing this.

Ok, I’ll start at the beginning. You know how the bible says God made the world in 7days? Imagine this, our one day is probably a mere nanosecond in God’s world. I once read somewhere that His one second is equivalent to probably 1000 years in our life! So if that were the case, since scientists have predicted our planet to be approximately 4.5 billion years old, this estimate may be right.

Ok, now that I have given my point of view on the creation of the world we know, I’ll go onto Adam and Eve. Say God did create all the beasts of the land, birds of the air, fish of the sea, then as we know it as now, things must have been the same for ages then, right? Assuming that were the case, we know that God mentioned that Adam and Eve were his initial creations for the form for the homo sapiens. Oddly, in the exile of Cain after slaying his brother, he managed to find a wife. Now, where this lovely lady come from? God made her on a whim too? I doubt. This means that whilst Adam and Eve were nicely sheltered in Eden (or Paradise, whichever you prefer) evolution had occurred outside of Eden where God had let nature take her course. It’s the only explanation where this lady came from. Any other explanation would point to incest and surely the bible wouldn’t be recording that eh?

Onto evolution and why I agree to it. Survival of the fittest is obvious all around you. Only the strongest have survived catastrophes, the weak ones perish from disease, inability to fend for themselves. The cunning and wily survive due to their quick wit. So yes, we are a result of this age old rule of nature. God gave us a mind and we used it. We managed to use it to achieve the greatness our species has.

As for his perfect homo sapiens, Adam’s lineage, it ended with Jesus. As we know, there isn’t a record of Jesus having a wife and children, but if He did, I’m ok with it. Makes Him all the more Man than God, yet Godly. *chuckle!* after all, He was God in the form of a Man. So yeah, Man will love and I’m sure Jesus must have been quite an attractive character considering the crowd he drew… ah! I digress!

God made in Eden, His perfect copies of the animals we have now, or maybe will have. He let evolution deal with making dinosaurs a chicken and a elephant because He was resting… remember? So anyhow, genes have proved evolution is the reason why we have marsupials and monotremes. Evolution of God’s initial copies resulted in big cats so alike yet so different, formation of crocs and alligators, birds of all shapes and sizes. Thus, creationism is hogwash if you say that everything hasn’t changed for the past few thousand years. You must be crazy to say so…

Just got back from Kuching, i'm tired but happy. there's loads of pictures for me to share with you all, but all in good time! but just so you know, malaysians should learn to line up. we have a serious problem there. in the airport, it's the most evident. the lines are messy and disorderly, you can't see a clear line, somewhere, the lines cross each other, wriggly and simply a headache to look at, much more to be in.

because i didn't bring my laptop, i sat on my trolley, jotting down my thoughts as i tried to past the time... for departure from kl, we were nearly 2 hours early. for departure from kuching, 1 hour... very early eh? anyway, it gives you time to look around and observe the way things are.

this CNY, used the LCCT (low cost terminal) to get to kuch and back. the LCCT is really shabby. it's small, and the check in area is stuffy and warm. people have no place to sit whilst waiting for their check in counters to open. anyway, you're paying less, i guess, by taking air asia... which brings me to another thing... i can't sleep on air asia seats. it's comfy and all, don't get me wrong, but the chair can't be adjusted to be more comfy to sleep in. to sit, it's fine, but to sleep... my poor neck.

Onward Bound!!!! Kuching, HERE I COME!!!!!

i won't be updating my blog for a few days. the past few days have been a whirlwind of activity. hahah!i have been making CNY goodies, shopping for a little boy's birthday, typed a stack of BM exercise sheets for my brother.

i'll be flying off tomorrow morning. properly stocked up on reading material for the plane. plan to wake up early to shower. only problem this time around is that we're taking air asia, so no food. thinking of taking more than one book... hmm...

anyway, will be jotting whatever i do in a book till i have access to a computer in Kuch, considering i won't be bringing my trusty ol' lappie. too bulky :S

Random Bits and Pieces

I’m going to be in so much trouble in the morning. I was out at Shan’s dinner till 1.30 in the morning. Des waited up for me, but the fellow is now upset at me. Apparently he was really tired and wanted to sleep, but I asked him to stay up a while more till I get home. Anyway, it’s not everyday that I go out till this late. I miss doing that actually, with no rules, no constraints.

I actually had fun today. I pretended to be all couture with Foo, joked around with the guys, mingled and socialised with the girls and last but not least, I relaxed. I had quite a few glasses of champagne too… haha! We had good food and a wonderful time. It isn’t often you hang out with “high society”.

It’s funny how my parents shun these people. When you catch them alone with close friends and family, they’re just your ordinary people. Shan and Foo, the two kids that I have been honoured to attend their 21^st birthday dinners blow me away with the amount of wealth and sophistication that their families have.

A little comparison between the two parties though. Foo’s party was all about sophistication. We were in an historical site, dining where British dignitaries once dined and drank. Foo’s party had music, dancing and a good set of dishes. The wine, it was well chosen, the champagne too. Foo’s family were very couture in a sense. His father had organised the party like a formal dinner, complete with a violinist and a belly dancer.

Shan’s party was more modern. It was organised by the hotel, it seems to me. Her dinner had wine, but not that good, but more selection of alcoholic drinks; champagne, white wine, red, and dessert wine. Her dishes were good, but not as snazzy as Foo’s Carcosa. When I mentioned this to Foo, he said something about heritage or what not. The wine wasn’t as tasty, but I think if I had did my research on wine, I would have chosen the right wine to accompany my champagne salmon.

Now, the after party. When I left Foo’s party, it was late. Shan’s, we piled out at 11.30 pm. After about 15 minutes, we piled into Mesquite ’52. I don’t know what the name’s supposed to mean, but someone, please educate me on the way people name bars. Anyhow, the only reason why I was there was to hangout with the birthday girl a bit more. I wasn’t that happy with the place though. Too boring.

Overall, I had fun tonight because of the company. The food was OK, but that’s as far as it goes. Sure, the salmon I had was great, but the overall dishes were so-so. I didn’t like the petite fours due to the amount of dark chocolate, neither did the chocolate cake appeal to me, I don’t really like dark chocolate. The appetiser was wild mushroom cream soup, Foo said something about adding more cream to it to make Crème la crème… haha! Just so you know, we ate at 3^rd Floor Restaurant at Marriott*.

On another note, why do Malaysians PRETEND to be so damn modest?! When I was studying abroad, when someone offers you a complement, you accept it graciously, thanking them then insisting that you could do better or something like that, if you feel it isn’t good enough. When I first came back to Malaysia some 12 years ago, I encountered an awkward situation.

I take pride in my art. I believe I can draw reasonably well, until my grandfather pointed out numerous defects when I tried to copy Van Gogh’s style. Anyway, that’s a tale for another day. It was art class that day, and we had just finished our drawings. As usual, the “popular” girls went around “Ooh”-ing and “Ah”-ing at everyone’s pictures. I heard the modest “No la”-s and just watched them approach my table.

Remember! I had just come back from a British Ed school and was used to their mannerisms. So, when the girls started their faux admiration, what does a girl like me do? I thanked them. I think I can never forget their faces of slight shock and the momentary silence in the group. I quickly countered by adding that so and so drew really well too, but I think the damage was done.

I have never been the super popular girl, part of the clichés that flounce around with a gaggle of boys wagging their tongues behind them. I was always in the group of girls that stood aside, with the boys, always with the guys, yet never really “girlfriend” material in their eyes. I used to envy the popular girls a little. It seemed nice to be able to flounce around and know that guys are crawling behind you.

Then came high school. A girl knows when she grows attractive, sometimes, she plays it right, sometimes she plays it wrong. I began to develop things that made the popular girls popular. But when you’re “one of the guys”, the guys find it hard to remember you’re a girl. It stayed that way for a long time. It wasn’t till I started to think confident and act confident that I managed to get someone. The rest? History.

I’m well aware that I may raise a few eyebrows. You may think, “You think you’re so hot?!”. I honestly don’t care what you think. For me to live daily, I have to believe in myself. Though my boyfriend thinks I’m hot, I know deep down inside, I may have my flaws (I break out in pimples at all the wrong times, I have cellulite, I have a huge ass and tiny upper body), but I have my good points too (I have good friends, I can adapt, I can still work my charm, I can hold intelligent conversations, etc…), and lucky for me, my good points outweigh my bad.

So next time someone compliments me about how I look, I’ll thank them graciously if I agree, I wouldn’t vehemently disagree. If I disagree, I’ll just point out why I don’t agree and let them open my eyes to something new that I never have noticed about me before (if the individual what praises me can’t validate their statement, they didn’t really mean it, and I’ll know…). That way, I can love me a little more everyday…

*I don’t mean to say your food sucks, I just don’t think I like bitter stuff all that much…

** dear, this doesn’t mean that every time you say I’m hot, I’ll agree. I very much an Ice Queen. And I still think I’m too skinny… can see my ribs le…

*** I wrote this at 2.30 in the morning but am only posting it now…

My Weird Ass Dream…

I had a seriously weird ass dream last night. So weird I have to blog it! Hahah! Anyway, it must be due to the mandarin orange I ate before going to bed last night! So, on with the dream! It starts like this…

I was staying at my great grandparent’s home. An old farm house in Kuching. It was more or less like I remembered it. The kitchen was small and airy with a door leading out to the yard. The main dining area had fused with the living area though, and my grandparents, my parents and siblings were hanging out there. Other than that, Prince, the singer, was there too… don’t ask me what he was doing there, but he was there.

So anyway, I was in the kitchen when I heard on the news about an escaped genetic mutation. Apparently, it was very dangerous and people were encouraged to stay in their homes and arm themselves. All I could think then, in the dream, was “What the fuck…” as I looked at the kitchen knives on the cement counter. Looking out of the kitchen window, I saw a lizard like tail on the roof attached to a human butt.

Honestly, in the dream, I felt totally calm, though in reality, I would have freaked out by then. Grabbing a cleaver, I whispered to some commando-looking guy in the kitchen that was assigned to protect us, that there was the lizard man on my roof (come to think of it, commando-looking-dude looked a lot like Bruce Willis). So basically, I ushered my grandma into the living area and started closing all the doors.

I warned Prince not to sing due to the mutated lizard-like thing on my roof, but then the singer seemed to have a dose of bravado and ranted on how he wouldn’t sit around to let some little reptile terrorise him. He grabbed a small craving knife and charged out of the house screaming his lungs out.

Needless to say, the mutated lizard thing leapt off the roof and at a crazy Prince brandishing his small knife at the 6 foot tall lizard thing (this approximation of the height does not include the length of the tail). My commando guy rushed out, cleaver in hand, to save the delirious Prince.

I on the other hand, began bolting all the door and leaving only one open for the commando dude and Prince to get in through. Commando guy drags the bleeding singer into my house with a gaping wound on his head. Prince however looked a whole different story, mumbling something about making his comeback hit about lizard men with croc teeth as his stomach showed basically all his innards.

My very pessimistic grandpa, on seeing the terrible condition Prince was in, said that our flimsy ancient doors wouldn’t hold against the lizard guy. Regardless, I bolted the last door and waited for reinforcements. Just as an armoured personal carrier rolled into the yard, Mr. Lizard guy pokes his snout in my window and starts snarling at me. I think I had a moment with the lizard thing, staring into his yellow eyes (see! I even remember the damn eyes).

Letting out a half scream, I start slashing its snout with my cleaver. The damn lizard skin seemed to absorb most of the damage and all I was doing was cutting maybe 1 – 2 cm deep gashes into it’s snout. Needless to say, I was starting to freak out when the scene of the dream changed.

Suddenly, I was in this huge house with a laboratory in my basement. In the dream in was aware that I was a renown scientist and was involved the further study of genetic mutations. I was walking back from the seaside when I saw that freaky abomination again. Running back into the house, I shut the heavy doors and barked instructions to my assistant to ensure that the entire family was safe in the higher floors.

Running to my laboratory, I saw that the lizard creature was amphibious and was swimming around in my observatory watching me with intent. Freaked out, I grabbed some paper and stuff before rushing out. I remember calling someone and screaming about the lizard thing being amphibious.

Running up the stairs, I had several concerns in my head, one was that children and husband were safe (children?! Husband?!). after looking in to the nursery and seeing my “husband” and “kids” safe and sound in the armoured room, I rushed up to check on my guest.

My guest was some sort of best friend and she was confused why the assistant insisted she was to shut her balcony door and start her fireplace to make get heat into the house. I recall the conversation was somewhere along the lines of:

“Why light the fireplace?”

“The freak outside can’t stand smoke,” I responded searching for paper to start the fire.

“Oh. You do realise that the fireplace hasn’t been used in the 2 years you moved in right?”

I nod as I empty the trashcan into the fireplace and light the cotton balls and tissue that were in the trashcan. In my mind, I think that sooner or later, I have to start breaking the furniture to keep the fire going… but something in the back of my mind says that I survive this problem.

At this, I wake up feeling a bit relieved and confused. Hahah!

Tribute...

This post will be a tribute to the uncles that I never got a chance to meet. Today was quite the eye opener. I think I’ve gotten to know my mother and my maternal side better today. How come? Now, that’s the story that I have to tell…

Today, I woke up early to send my youngest brother to school. He was supposed to buy some supplies for his test today so I had to wake up early to buy it for him. Anyhow, this resulted in me not sleeping till 11 in the morning… so, I ended up gaming a bit till about 10 then started to help mum out in the kitchen. We were making Chinese New Year goodies.

My mum and I were talking about all sorts of stuff, mainly gossiping. Anyway, the conversation somehow came to her two younger brothers that passed away very young. The first younger brother drowned by the river. He was watching my uncle swimming by the jetty, when a boat came in and knocked the little fella into the water. My uncle, was only around 6 years old.

Mum barely remembers him, but the other uncle that died was the one that seemed to draw some sort of emotion out of her. She was thinking and remembering him as she told me about him. Her second brother was drowned by the sea.

I don’t know what my uncle’s name was, but I know he passed away when he was around 15. My mum was already married to my dad for about a year or so and was staying in Miri, what happened was he went out to play with his friends and they were by the beach. The fishermen had told them to go home because it was high tide and dangerous. My uncle and his best friend were left behind by the other group and somehow or rather drowned.

I was once told that they went back to get the ball and got dragged out by the currents. The fishermen there didn’t hear the boys call for help, so they didn’t know they were drowning. What was devastating was the group of friends they were with. My mother said that she hadn’t really liked the family of the kids my uncle was playing with. They were really terrible from what my mother described.

Initially, when my grandmother was worried because my uncle didn’t come home, she went to ask that family where he might be. They told my grandmother that they were playing by the large monsoon drain near the house. Terrified, my big uncle dived and swam from one end to the next, looking for my uncle. Mind you, it was getting dark. After searching for hours, my big uncle was sure that his younger brother had not drowned in the drain, so he went back to the house to ask the family where his youngest brother was.

Imagine the anxiety of the family? My poor grandparents went to the house to beg them to tell them where their youngest child was. My uncle was there too. I’m from a very traditional chinese family and begging does not come easy to these kind of people. When they finally told my grandparents that the boys were by the sea in the evening, it was too late. The time was about midnight.

My mum got the call and flew back immediately. She still believes that if they had found out the boys were out at sea, they would have been able to save them or, if not, save my grandparents the anxiety. My mum was rather upset when she told me about this. She told me that her youngest brother was doing well in school and was a very good kid. My dad used to play chess with him apparently.

So yeah, this post is a tribute the uncles I never met and for those that I never had the honour to meet…

This is a Post to Clarify Things…

For those that read my blog, I’m sure that you may have varying reactions to my posts. Just to clarify things a bit

· I do not have relationship problems

• Nick is not seeing anyone other than me
• I was just feeling down because I couldn’t go out with them
  
• I was jealous in general with the whole group being able to spend time with him
• I’m not jealous of his car, or any of his mechanical obsession. It would be weird if he focused all his obsessions on me.

Really, do I sound bitter and angry with my boyfriend? I didn’t mean for it to seem that way. Anyhow, the girl, S is really nice. I’ve met her before. Secondly, I was having a bad day yesterday. I had to make it worse by watching some chick flick where I had plenty of time to dwell on the “Aw! How sweet!” moments.

So, yeah, I’m a weird moody (mardy) creature that can be happy and grumpy in a blink of an eye. I have a stupid mind that thinks too much when I’m left alone without anything to stimulate it. So don’t get any wrong ideas. I draw the line when it comes to blogging about my relationship. I will never bad mouth my boyfriend online… it’s low. And I would definitely not blab about any problems we have on my blog. It’s personal stuff that we will settle on our own.

Thanks

Jealous Little Me (Part 2)

I’m being silly again. I’m jealous. Terribly jealous of all the people that get to hang out with my boyfriend. I really feel stupid. Lately, he’s been spending loads of time this girl, S, who’s his friend’s uni mate. Nothing’s going on between them, as far as I know. I also know that there most likely would not ba anything happening as his friend has a thing for S.

I just don’t like knowing that another girl is in such close proximity with him. I hate knowing that I’m not the one sitting next to him in a jam packed car. It’s stupid, I know, but everyone has their bad days, and today maybe one of them for me. I'm just feeling all mardy... It's highly irritating cos i know in my heart that he's not the type to do the cheating thing. and further more, it's frustrating for me to even think this way!!! argh! i'll just try not to dwell on it.

Alone at Home... Whether I Want to or Not…

It’s a bit frustrating being me, I dare say. I’ve been sitting at home, wishing I was out there hanging out with Nick and the guys. Really missing it a lot. My folks would never allow me to go off to Ampang to hang out with them at Al Rosha. Nuh uh! So here I am, sitting in my room blogging as my boyfriend and his friends hang out in Al Rosha.

Some of you may think that I shouldn’t be sticking so close to my Nick and leave him some time to be with his guys, trust me, I do. But over time, I have become their friend too. You can’t really expect otherwise. Nick and I have been together for nearly 3 years now. So his friends have sort of become mine. Sometimes, I wish things could be a little different. I wish that my parents wouldn’t be so strict and let me out to do whatever I want! It’s not like I’m 5!!! I’m already more than 20 years old!

Anyhow, I think they shouldn’t have let me stay alone in the first place, in that case. Once they let me stay out in the hostels, I grew up and made a lot of my own decisions. Yes, I admit, I made a lot of stupid decisions, but I sleep in the bed I make. But the thing is I’m used to my life of independence. I’m used to doing things by myself and not having to ask for permission.

Right now, all I have is messages from Nick to let me know what’s going on and what they’re talking about. It would be nice to be there and I’d like to think that they’re all so relaxed around me that they can talk about anything. Ah well, I’ll have to wait donkey years before that can happen again.

Things Kids Say and Do (Part II)

This is what my brother told me just yesterday night.

Bert: zhe zhe ar... my friend told me to eat more long beans
Me : why ar?
Bert: cos his daddy said that if you eats loads of long beans, you grow tall...
Me : ...

how do you respond to that? anyhow, the little fella is full of weird comments and words that i swear, there are times you want to yell at him and times you just feel like laughing at him. but i think dad's super funny. i think when you have more than one kid, you tend to get a bit messed up.

Situation : dad wants me to clean my brother's room (which i obviously won't like doing)

Dad : Boy... er, bert..aiya, girl ar!!!
Me : .... you still can't get our names right eh?

it doesn't happen once in a while! it's nearly 70% of the time when he calls us to his room. it starts off with the child he sees in front of him, then realising his error, he runs through the rest of the names he calls us, ending up with all three of us in the room... hahah!

31st of Jan, End of the First Month of 2007! :o

Honestly, i think time passes really really quickly. already, february is an hour away. by the time i finish this post, i think it'll be the 1st of Feb.i don't type slow, it's just that when i blog, i do numerous other things too :P. but i digress.... hahah!

anyhow, just got back from a date with nick. nice way to end the month le! :) we went to watch epic movie. not bad, but then not the kind of money you want to spend money on la. it's just those really dumb movies full of cheap laughs. good if you're having an already good time. but for those bitter people with gloom and doom hanging over your heads, go watch something as depressing as you and paint your eyes black.

ok... my mind is flying off the handle again... but who gives a shit eh? hahah! it's my bloody blogs, if i digress, so? anyhow, i finished the embroidery i was planning to give nick for valentine's day. looking at it, it's not thaaaat nice, but i think i did a relatively good job. after valentine's i think i'll post up the pics on my hard work :P.

planning to start a new embroidery project. plan to do "faat" or "prosperity" in gold. found mum's stash of gold thread, and since she doesn't sew anymore, i'll just use it. thinking of doing it on the red cloth i found. mum's sewing basket is a sewing maniac's heaven! (i get so much fun just looking through the needles and her old patchwork projects). after all, we're talking about the woman who made mine, my brother's and her own blankets. our quilts are all product of mum's hard work. i'm never throwing my quilt away. even when i get married, i'll take it with me!

in the spirit of CNY, i took out my maroon bedclothes and now my room's got a autumn theme to it. my drapes are a soft gold colour, warm and cheery. my bedsheet's maroon, my pillow case is maroon with little green motives. my other "fat" pillow's soft brown with beige. my bolster is covered in checkered maroon cloth. very autumn-y eh? hahah! the best thing is my furniture is mostly wood. i have sarawakan vases (two white and black ones, one white, blue and brown vase).

i'm pleased with my current setting of my room and theme. i have dark blue drapes for when i have the mood for dark and gloomy. hahah! i'm really weird, i rearrange my room from time to time to see what setting's the best for my mood.

ok. this part is regarding a comment i recieved from my previous post.

i just don't understand how some women can get jealous of a car... i mean like, really... a car?!?! it's something inanimate! it can't give your bf/hubby a hug and kiss when he's all upset, now, can it?! whenever nick tells me of forummers in ZTH that are selling their "sayang"s because their wives are making noise, i wonder why. when you married the chap, you knew he was going to driving that car around everywhere. before you married the chap, i dare say he's taken you out in the damn car, now eh?

so think about it. i rather nick's obssession in cars than in chicks. i thank God for the car mags that he buys (he prefers things with substance than with chicks). i rather compete with a damn car than with another woman. as i said, there's alot of things that i can do that the car can't. nick doesn't spend so much money on me in comparison with the car, but i'm not complaining. he's got an expensive hobby, and i have a cheap one (reading, and currently, sewing).

we're both studying. i don't want pressies from nick whilst he's still getting allowance from his dad. it'll be more like i'm recieving the presents from his dad, right? logical eh? nick constantly tells me he feels that he doesn't give enough. but honestly, he's given me alot. not everyone has a boyfriend that would fly down from cheras to kiara just to comfort me. not every guy would put up with my weird moods when i'm PMS-ing. he's the one that actually notices when i'm about to get it cos he claims i have tell-tale signs in my moods and quirks. somthig about crazy and cravings...

nick lets me yabber on and on about my classic fiction, so i let him yabber about his cars. i'm not losing anything in listening to him nyam nyam about throttle bodies and intake manifolds (his lastest obsession)... he doesn't lose anything when i blab blab blab about madame bovary and her romantic conquests... people just have to work out an understanding to be happy together.

so yeah, cars? phshaw. the ke70 will not replace you in his heart. the 350z? yes, it'll capitvate him for maybe a few months, but where will he be sleeping at night? in the car mer?! and finally, so what if he got that new turbo kit, you turbo charge your sex appeal and he'll be asking you what turbo means... ;)

Hand’s OFF!!!

I’m a very jealous person. I do not like it when the attention usually showered on me is diverted to someone else. I do not appreciate my boyfriend harbouring attention on any other female than myself for more than a week. I do not like if my family were to shower my brothers with gifts much more extravagant than mine.

My mother told me that when my first brother was born, I refused to go near him. I cried and refused to be put down or leave my mother’s side. Even up till today, I harbour a sort of jealousy when I look at the close relationship between some mothers and daughters (though I myself have a close relationship with my own mum).

Now, lately, I have been unable to go out and party. I haven’t in a while and miss a good night out dancing. With my parents being back, I don’t do a lot of the things I used to do. Anyhow, that means that I don’t club anymore or go out till the early morn.

My boyfriend went out last night to Maison with his old schoolmates, which I have no problem with. The only problem I had was I wasn’t there. I know the clubbing scene very well. Girls dance seductively, cast coy looks and beer goggles do things to guys. Anyway, there was this girl that obviously has never met me or known that Nick is only allowed to dance in a particular way with me!

I like to think that I can trust Nick in a room full of naked super hot women, but if the situation does arise, I know damn well, he wouldn’t touch them unless necessary. Now, this applies to daily life. Only I’m allowed to hold him close to me, only I’m allowed to kiss him on the neck, ONLY I’M allowed to grind my hips into him when we dance close in the clubs.

Now, I won’t say who this person is, but trust me, my boyfriend tells me everything (see! I can trust him!). She rubs up against him, bumping and grinding with him!!! That’s a big no can do, darling! If I were there, I think I’d cut in and give her my bitchiest stare before showing her how it should be done! Hahah!

Nick can hold his own in many things, but as I said in an earlier post, we girls are nasty little devils in disguise. He can’t hold his own in a club against a girl dancing with him. He didn’t know how to respond to this, more or less, stranger grinding up against him. Not to mention said female knows that Hans has something for her and poor Hans was there with Nick… didn’t I say we girls are horribly manipulative?

Argh! Lucky for that nasty little thing, I wasn’t there, or else… I just keep making pathetic empty threats, don’t i? anyhow, I am seriously possessive of my boyfriend. Please don’t try my patience, girls. I really don’t tolerate these things well. I know a good thing when I see it and my boyfriend is as good as good gets. He was on the market for so long before I came into the picture. You had your chances, it’s over, so get over it and don’t come slinking around my property.

TRESPASSERS WILL BE PERSECUTED, OR SHOT ON SIGHT!

ps: i don't mean to say i hate this girl who danced with nick that way. she may not have known that he had a girlfriend, but i just found i needed to let out some of my amusement and negative vibes, k? i'm sorry if i offended anyone in particular, but it's my blog. i have the right to write what i want.

Classical Beauties...

Went with nick to a place that restores classic cars. i don't have any pictures, but the next time i do happen to go there, i will bring a camera. nick wanted to send his brand "new" ford cortina to be restored. we went there at around 2 - 3pm wandered around the compound of the building looking at the cars they had restored.

after gushing over the cars for about 30 minutes, the guys that nick had been waiting for had come. they either work, or own this company, AMC (All Makes Classic). they basically restore classic cars that they happen across or that people enlist them to. i think i have never seen so many classical cars all in a single area. not only that, they have vintages too! i think i must have looked pretty "jakun" at first, staring wide-eyed at the cars there.

anyhow, nick's planning to restore his mk3's body there. the price they quoted him was pretty reasonable too! they estimated the car would take approx. 2-3k to do up nicely. there are alot of rust spots and all that techincal mumbo jumbo that's spoilt, but then the price they quote seemed reasonable. not only that, they work at their own pace. they prefer to work on a whole car in one go rather than several cars. due to that, there were quite a few cars lined up waiting to be restored. then again, it's good, cos then you know that the work that they do wouldn't be rushed and messy.

basically, they were helpful with nick, answering his queries and stuff. but then, the job that they did with the cars there... wow! if you ever happen to be in KL and just being itchy to look at the nice nice cars (i don't know if they mind la), but the lot is next to the roundabout at Jln. Tun Razak, i think... hahah! but those are beautiful cars... really...

Sugar and Spice, and Everything NOT Nice...

Oooh! we girls are such venomous and seriously spiteful creatures. this thought popped up when i was washing my dishes today... (don't bother asking me how it comes up... i think in random stops). anyhow, my boyfriend asked me about this matter once.

for any males out there that have not felt the barb of a woman they may have spite, i warn you, we women, are not nice. we're manipulative little spitfires with minds so scary that many men would run looking into the way we think. when women began fighting for equal rights in society, we also realised that we had to think of ways to prove how capable we are. but then again,this has been evident since time in memorial!

the females in the wild have to compete with the alpha female for the males. why? the alpha female will be the ones that have the best meat and they are usually the one with stronger offspring. in many ancient civilisations, women have ruled behind their sons or husbands. they were the ones who schemed and planned whilst their husbands or sons dealt with the people directly.

in your everyday group of friends, you can observe this. there is the group of girl led by the prettiest and most dynamic female. she's usually identified with the brilliant smile and wonderfully PR personality. she's charming around the guys and usually has no problem handling men. she may be a rough and tumble girl that's "one of the guys" or she could be in the form of the "princess" that everyone turns to, with her escort of ladies in waiting.

not long ago, i was a victim of the spitefulness of the feminine world. there was a girl that the guys really enjoyed hanging out with and i had never met her before. nick was rather excited at introducing me to her cos he thought that we would hit off easily. she's not attractive physically due to her size, but her character is one with self confidence and she carries herself with the knowledge that regardless, everyone will like her. on seeing her, i couldn't really agree with what nick said, there was a certain aura about her when she looked at me that i didn't like.

when nick finally got a chance to introduce me to her, he was shocked when all she did was offer me a curt thin-lipped smile. it's normal practice for women to act this way. i do that whenever i find that my boyfriend may be offering a particular girl too much attention and i respond similarly. i'm much more subtle though... i choose get to know the girl to know if she's any threat to me (usually not).

it's survival that makes us this way. some woman makes it hard for us to be noticed, so we make it up with wit. some girls make us look bland so respond in the ability to hold an exciting conversation. to anchor herself in her boyfriends life, the first thing a girl would do is get his friends to like her presence or get used to her. that's adaptation and proper planning on my side. i planned to befriend all of the friends that matter to nick so i know the people he cares for. that way, i wouldn't face any opposition from them if i may have offended them.

guys may have their grading scheme for evaluating their best mate's girlfriend, but we girls are altogether different. we evaluate on every aspect possible. the evaluation is repeated time to time. nick doesn't know this, but if he reads this, well, darling, now you know :). it's not a scary thing. we girls just sit down and talk about our boyfriends, problems we face, how to overcome it and just discuss. through this way we usually can tell whether the guy is a keeper since true friends don't hold back on the truth... (we also discuss ways to hold their attention ;))

No Pork? Where can....

funny ass clip... RK House got no pork oh! remember!