Feeling a bit down today. Not sure why. There are a few factors that may be the issue, but I hardly think that it would cause me to feel so under the weather. Anyways, as of late, I've been riding on a roller coaster of feelings. There are some days where I start off feeling fantastic, then end up feeling just too fucked up to give a damn about how others feel, then switch into a hyper mood to sort of cover up whatever frustration in me. It's starting to take a toll on me I suppose.
I'm a person that tries, really hard sometimes, not to let others into how I feel about certain things. I've learnt from experience that expressing myself too openly may not always be the best thing to do. Even if I'm really having a screwy day, I try to remember that it isn't your fault that I feel messed up, so I make an effort to be nice. Of course, if you are the object that has been sticking into my side like a thorn, don't expect me to be kind.
I hate to get involved in confrontations with people I care deeply for. It makes me so frustrated if I can't resolve it without. Not only that, I usually get into situations where people take out their frustrations on me. I sometimes wonder why I put up with it, and then I remember that I do so because I care for them. Forgiveness is something I think I've been handing out too much lately. Harsh words and stinging insults that may seem in jest sometimes hit me in the wrong way on a wrong day.
This isn't a post to gain pity from you, my readers, I just need an outlet today. I need to let out a few sore feelings and get a little weight off my heavy heart.
P.s people, don't take any of this to heart. Those who read this post, you may have, or may not have rubbed me the wrong way, but I won't hold it against you. I just don't know how.
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